I hate Tuesday mornings. I just hate them. They just always seem like the longest day of the week. No one ever has a good Tuesday and today, this Tuesday did not disappoint my theory.

Here I am, minding my business like any other God forsaken Tuesday and here comes my nosey cat Jellyfish dragging in things he has no business. Jellyfish is technically a house cat, but he does not care about my objections about roaming the neighborhood and runs outside every chance he gets. He always comes home though so I guess that’s good. Every time he goes on his little adventures, he brings me something back. A keepsake if you will. Usually random buttons, dead birds, toys, one time it was his pregnant cat girlfriend. Boy, was that one fun. But today, he took the cake. Gotta love Jellyfish.

My alarm goes off like any other boring morning. Snooze it a few times and then I finally throw my legs over the side. Might as well get this day over with. Jellyfish is nestled right where my feet landed so he scratches the side of my leg to let me know not to disturb his slumber. See what I mean? A typical Tuesday morning. I stagger over to the bathroom to fully access the damage. Not too bad. A band-aid will do. I managed to make it through my morning without many more incidents. Finally, it is time to head to work. I am a 6th grade teacher and let me tell you…. kids are mean. I went through college excited to teach the younger generation and lead them to success but instead I am teaching the world’s worst generation. Who knew 11/12-year-olds would end up being the devils’ spawns? But I am going to pay my debt to society and teach these miscreants how to multiply. I gather my coffee cup, my laptop and my dignity and head towards the door. As my Tuesday luck would have it, here comes Jellyfish out of virtually nowhere darting out into the neighborhood to wreak havoc as only he does. I don’t have the time to chase him down so let’s just hope he can hold his own until I get back.

I pull up to Radleywood Middle School and stop to take a breath. Only 8 more hours until I am out of this place. I see Ms. Leslie getting out at the same time as me…I am just going to sit back for a second. She talks soooo much and I am not in the mood. She spots me, waves and is obviously waiting for me to get out of the car. Sigh…. Tuesday blues. Luckily, I did not have to say much. All I got out was Good Morning before she went into some detailed story about her night escapades of doing puzzles or something. I stopped paying attention after the Good Morning exchange.

The day went faster than expected. I only had to send one student to the office. No one yelled at me, pranked me, and no one ate my lunch. Maybe this day won’t be as bad as I thought. I got through the day unscathed. I should stop for some Chipotle to commemorate my semi- normal Tuesday. Even get double meat because why not? Gotta treat yourself sometimes. I got through the line in record time and accidentally got two sour creams. What a nice turn of events.

I am jamming to Pretty Rickey circa 2006 and pull up to see Jellyfish waiting for me with something hanging out his mouth. I bet it’s a dead mouse or bird. It’s gross but at least I didn’t have to go search for him again. Gather my belongings and food and head toward the front door. Jellyfish drops his gift at my feet. I freeze…. This is not a dead bird or mouse…. This is a severed finger with a huge ring on it. What the hell? I grab a napkin out my chipotle bag and grab the finger. Halloween just passed. This must be leftover decoration, right? Gosh, I hope that’s what this is. Upon further review, this looks like a real human finger. DAMN IT! Look at what this dang cat dragged in. All I wanted to do was eat my Chipotle and watch The Masked Singer. I shoo Jellyfish inside and throw this treasure into a sandwich bag. I must take this to the police.

How do I walk in a police station and explain I have a random finger and I have absolutely nothing to do with it. I was just an innocent bystander to a nosey cat. Sigh, away I go.

Well, I guess it is time to be a good Samaritan. I gather Jellyfishs’ find and head towards the door. Should I put the finger in the little bowl when I go through the metal detectors? It has a ring on it, and I don’t know what is more embarrassing…putting a severed finger in a bowl? Or having the metal detector go off because I have a severed finger with a ring in my pocket? What a decision to have to make. Either way, I settled on just putting it in the bowl. Don’t want to look guilty. I know the officer who looked in the bowl had questions. Thank God he didn’t ask because I still don’t know how I am about to explain this. I make my way to the desk and ask the scowling officer at the desk who can I talk to about something I found. She looked up and asked what it was. I just put the bag on the desk because I mean… what do you say? She looked at me and then the bag and me again. “It’s not mine.” With a nervous laugh. The officer calls someone on the walkie and walks out Sheriff McKee according to the badge. I take a deep breath and spout off how Jellyfish showed up with this random finger and how it clearly belongs to a body that should be found. Sheriff McKee takes the bag, lifts it up in the light, shakes it a bit and hands it back. It’s fake, he said. I look at it… “you sure?” He nods. “Yes ma’am, you got a trick instead of a treat” and chuckles. I don’t know man. This looks super realistic. But if he says so. I guess all that build up for nothing. I might as well go eat my chipotle and empty my DVR.

I am back in the comfort of my home, staring at Jellyfish living carefree unaware of how he shook the last two hours of my life up. It must be nice. I know that Sheriff said it was just a decoration, but I touched it, smelled it, looked at it outside of the bag. I know that was a real finger. I just know it. Something just isn’t sitting right here.

I finished my chipotle and guessed all the masked singers I could and something is still swirling around my head. Whose finger is that? Sigh, let me go mindlessly scroll until I fall asleep. Clearly, I am just bored and need something to do with my spare time. I really was here minding my business, when the RadleyWood Remembrance Page came up and here right here in my face is a missing ad…for a woman who finger has that ring right there shining. I knew it was real!! Who is this woman? Through the comments I have gathered that she is a 26-year-old young woman named Tamyra Lions who was recently engaged right before she came up missing 7 weeks ago.

I google her to get all the information I can. This can not be a coincidence that the finger I found looks exactly like the finger of this missing woman with the exact same ring. I must tell Sheriff McKee what I found. What if this finger is the link to solving a crime and giving some sad family and fiancée some peace. Gasp! What if it is evidence against the fiancée? Everyone knows 90% of the time, the lover did it.

I couldn’t sleep at all. I spent all night googling and perusing Tamyra socials. This finger and ring certainly belong to her. I am convinced. I am not in the mood for the future generation today, so I am going to call in sick and head to Sheriff to let him know all the things I found out. This could lead to finding her! I have to dart out the front door to beat out Jellyfish. Last thing I need is him to drop some random ear at my door. Only one mystery at a time.

I walk in and this time it is a smiling officer at the desk. What a nice change of pace. I ask for Sheriff McKee and he happily calls Sheriff to the front. Sheriff Mckee sees me and smiles. “You’re back. You found the rest of the body that belongs to that finger?” he says jokingly. “Sorta. I was scrolling and came across this city IG remembrance page, and this finger and ring looks freakishly like the finger of a missing girl who just moved here” Sheriff face goes serious. Finally, he is taking me seriously! He looks at me and said “oh? A missing person? Who?” Matter of factly, like I knew this young girl I respond with the name I uncovered, Tamyra Lions.” Sheriff just goes silent. After what seemed like forever, he asked if I had the finger with me. Well of course! We have a crime to solve. I take the sandwich bag wrapped finger out my purse and this time Sheriff grabs it quickly and looks again. “I’ll take it this time. See if I can get some fingerprints off it or something. Thank you for making us aware of this” I opened my mouth, and he immediately responds with “I’ll take it from here. Thank you. Have a good day ma’am” Am I tripping or is he being weird? Maybe he just takes his police work seriously.

I head to the car feeling uneasy. Something was off. But I did my part as a good Samaritan. Now, what do I do? Do some good deed shopping. I mean, I am off and I did just do a good thing. I deserve some new boots.

I just can’t focus on this shopping. The Sheriff reacted so strangely. Did he know Tamyra? I head to Starbuck’s because I think better with coffee and grilled cheese. As I enjoy the gooey cheesiness I head to the comments on Tamyra page. This time I go alllllll the way to the bottom of her page. You know the pictures where people comment on that’s trying to get your attention without being too conspicuous. In her likes I see a name that says SheriffBae or something. I click on it and what do you know…. It’s Sheriff McKee. And I as I delve more into Tamyra pictures…. Sheriff McKee has liked almost every picture. Maybe…. I should mind my business. Instead of following my first mind, I find the fiancée of Tamyra. I messaged him and sent him a picture of the finger and explanation of how I got it and where it is now. He responds immediately like he has been waiting on this moment his whole life. He explains that Tamyra was getting stalked by someone and getting eerie messages. The day she disappeared; she was supposed to be heading to the police station to talk to her stepfather for help and advice on what to do because she was getting scared. You’ll never guess who the stepfather is…. Ok maybe you would….